I bumped into a pal of mine in town yesterday. I remembered that the last time I had seen him he told me he had taken up skydiving and was about to complete his first solo jump. I asked him how he had got on with it. 'Well', he said, 'to be honest, when I got in the doorway of the plane I froze. I just couldn't bring myself to go through with it'.
'So what happened'? I asked. He replied. 'The instructor who was stood behind me unzipped his jumpsuit, pulled out his enormous willy and said 'If you're not out of that door in thirty seconds this is going up your backside''.
'Did you jump'? I asked.
He replied.
'When he first put it in I did'.